Why are we all still obsessed with mustaches? I agree it was fun for a hot 5 minutes. I may have wandered into Urban Outfitters and handled some overpriced mustache shit. But now a search on UrbanOutfitters.com returns 35 products. The same search on Claires.com returns 75. Let’s all pause to remember that mustaches are, almost always, unwanted facial hair. It is a rare few men that can pull off a ‘stache… really only Tom Selleck and Hitler come to mind. Not YOU preteen with your furry iPhone case, or YOU pseudo-hipster with your mustache tee.
Actually the only thing I enjoy about this mustache craze is the cruel irony between its biggest advocates. Preteens vs. Pseudo-hispters. I’ll produce the reality show. It can be hosted by Avril Lavinge.
Maybe it’s the placement of these mustaches that really fuels my issue. Mustaches on a tall beer glass? Chuckle. Actual mustaches you stick on your face? Game on. But this pink furry car mustache… just try me. It’d be less road rage, more my civic duty.
Let’s just promise to care half as much about anything else as we care about mustaches.
Love and judgement,